Grilled Cheese

Grilled Cheese Sandwiches

2 (two) slices of bread
2 (two) processed Kraft (no substituting for crappy crap cheese here) cheese slices
1 teflon coated frying pan
1 stove
1 spatula (optional if you’re comfortable with the ‘pan flip technique’)
Butter (margarine is for the weak)


  1. Butter the two slices of bread on 1 (one) side.
  2. Warm frying pan on heat dial 6/9 (thats six out of nine) on your stove.
  3. Place buttered bread slice with the buttered side down on the warm frying pan.
    3.1. Quickly (hence 3.1) place 2 (two) slices of cheese on the bread, offset for maximum bread coverage.
    3.1.1. Quickly, but not as quickly as 3.1, place the second peice of bread on top of the offset cheese slices, buttered side facing up (away from the cheese).
  4. Flip the package (henceforth refered to as the ‘sandwich’) as soon as you see a whisp of smoke from the bottom of the bread (slice facing the pan).
  5. Remove the sandwich from the frying pan and place on plate or other cutting surface.
  6. Cut the sandwich diagonally across the body, creating two triangle (shape with 3 sides) shaped peices. This technique will most likely result in the create of an isocolese triangle, do not be frightened. This shape is by design.
  7. Eat the sandwich, be mindful of the high quality processed Kraft cheese slices in the middle, which may or may not be hot (this hinges on the expediency of the creation of the triangle shaped sandwich peices).
  8. Once the sandwich has been consumed, wash your plate, frying pan and spatula (spatula optional, based on comfort level of the ‘pan flip technique’).

Optional Additions

  • Ketchup (Heinz, no other will do. Don’t even try it.)


Lost (perhaps slightly drunk upon creation of this recipe)

What do I do with the 2 extra pieces of cheese??? I’m sooo confused!